


Through Hell and Back

by Amariahellcat



Series: Arisa Shepard [7]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Biotic Shepard, Destroy Ending, F/M, Fluff, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Mass Effect 3, No Shepard without Vakarian, Paragon Commander Shepard, Post-Destroy Ending
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-18
Updated: 2017-08-18
Packaged: 2018-12-17 02:21:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11841951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amariahellcat/pseuds/Amariahellcat
Summary: It’s time. Time for the final fight, the last chance - they can do it, she’s sure of it, if they can only get there.Arisa Shepard made a promise. She’ll do her damn best to keep it.Spoilers for ME3 Endgame. Plus some extra happiness.





	Through Hell and Back

**Author's Note:**

> Apparently Day 2 of a Migraine is a good time to write minor angst. Oops. Enjoy ♥

They hit the Cerberus Base, defeat Kai Leng… and then it’s a mad-dash back to the Normandy, back to the War Room, contacting Hackett and getting things under way.

It’s time to go back to Earth, to finish the War… no matter the outcome.

They’ve brought every race together, located every possible resource, rescued every diplomat and bomber squad and scientist they possibly could.

The Crucible is ready - a feat only accomplished through the collective efforts of every race, guarded by the Alliance fleets as it’s guided towards Earth.

Towards the Citadel.

Towards the  _Catalyst_.

The combined forces hit the Reapers as fast and hard as they’re able to, allowing the Normandy to slip through the madness, close enough for the shuttle to drop and take Shepard and her squad closer in.

They take out the AA Gun, make it to the extraction shuttle… and then it’s time to prepare for the final assault.

No matter how strong her mask is, Arisa is terrified. They’ve been to hell and back, survived a suicide mission… but this is so much bigger.

She holds the mask through every conversation she has, every interaction with a squad member or a friend… until she gets to Garrus and the facade cracks, just a little.

Because if she loses him, after everything they’ve been through, it won’t matter if she survives.

“Maybe once all this is done, we can find out what a Turian-human baby looks like,” he chuckles, trying to distract her, make her laugh, so typically Garrus that she wants to cry.

“I’m game.” she mumbles honestly, stepping in close with her hands on his chest, his closing tightly around her waist,  “Though  _adoption_  might be the best route for us…”

He  _hums_  thoughtfully, mandibles flaring briefly, “Well, there  _will_  be a lot of little Krogan running around…”

“We just…. have to beat the Reapers, first.” she blows out a breath, crossing her arms.

“James told me there’s a saying on Earth… ‘may you be in heaven half an hour before the devil realises you’re dead. I’m not sure if Turian Heaven is the same as yours, but… if this thing goes sideways, and we both end up there… meet me at the bar. I’m buying.”

“We’re a team, Garrus.” Arisa steps into his space, voice low, “There’s no Shepard without Vakarian. So you better remember to  _duck_.”

“Sorry, Turians don’t know how. I’ll improvise. And Shepard - Arisa.” Garrus reaches for her hands then and she gladly returns the grip, head tilted back to meet his gaze, “Forgive the insubordination, but your boyfriend has an order for you.”

He dips his head, breath warm on her face, “ _Come back alive_. It’d be an awfully empty galaxy without you.”

Arisa can’t help it; she lets out a hollow laugh and steps further into him, pressing as close as she can and kissing him, feeling him return the touch and slip his hands around her waist to hold her just as tightly.

“If I’m up there in that bar, and you’re not-” she breathes, just barely pulling back, “-I’ll be looking down. You’ll  _never_  be alone.”

She can’t handle the conversation anymore - knows she won’t be able to keep going if she stays still, lets the thoughts linger - so she pulls gently away and turns to go, to speak to the other squad members stationed around.

She just barely hears Garrus whisper  _Never_  before she’s out of earshot.

* * *

 

 There’s no time after that; they’re running to take down the Reaper guarding the Beam and survive waves of monsters, making a mad-dash from the transport when it’s struck down.

Arisa skids under an air-born Mako only to stop breathing when it nearly slams down on top of Garrus and Liara -  _Spirits, no, shit!_

They’re in one piece, not actually pinned, but  _injured_ , and it brings back terrible memories of finding Garrus on Omega, blue blood spilling everywhere while his life drained-

The Normandy responds to her EVAC order and she helps him up the ramp, passing him to Liara at the top “Here, take him.”

“Shepard-”

“You gotta get out of here.”

“And you’ve gotta be  _kidding_  me.”

“Don’t argue, Garrus.”  _Please. I need to know you’re safe._

“We’re in this till the end!” he’s as stubborn as she is, struggling weakly against Liara’s hold.

“No matter what happens here-” Arisa’s voice is breaking but she can’t help it, walking back up the ramp to press her hand over his scarred mandible one last time, “-you know I love you. I always will.”

“Arisa, I-” Garrus’ voice is weak but determined, blue eyes locked on her face, “I love you, to.”

She backs away then, forcing herself to ignore him reaching for her, heart pounding as she waves them off with an ordered  _GO!_  before turning and racing off towards the beam - dodging downed men and vehicles and explosions, running faster than she’s ever run before.

_Please, get out of here, stay alive, I need you-_

Then the Reaper hits her and everything goes black.

* * *

 

She’s not sure how long she’s out, but all she knows is  _pain_  when consciousness returns.

Pieces of her armor are broken and missing, the rest of it charred and mutilated. Her helmet is gone, her weapons scattered, and she grabs at the only gun left in sight.

She can feel her biotics, ever present, but doesn’t know if she can control them; takes out the few Husks and single Marauder she encounters with shaky shots, stepping into the Beam the moment she’s close enough.

Arisa’s never seen this part of the Citadel, and knows it will haunt her nightmares for the rest of her life.

Anderson’s on the comm, and she slowly makes her way forwards, looking straight ahead, sickened by the bodies strewn haplessly about.

Except when she finds him he’s being controlled, and the Illusive Man is more far gone than she’d ever imagined.

Yet injured or not, she’s still Commander Shepard; by the book and known for being good at talking her way out of tough situations.

In the end, the Illusive Man puts a bullet through his own head.

Anderson lasts only a few moments more, and then Hackett is on the comms propelling her forwards, fighting against the pain and weakness.

_It isn’t firing. Something’s not right._

In the end, the Catalyst is both not what she expected and yet ridiculously familiar. The child she’s been chasing in her dreams.

_We failed to control you,_  it tells her, voice the steady note of an AI.  _Now that you’ve made it this far, the choice is yours._

Arisa pretends to listen to the options, but her choice is clear; she knows exactly which path Anderson would take.

_EDI, Joker… forgive me._  There is the tiniest hope that they’ve speced the Crucible well enough that it won’t… but she doesn’t know.

Just knows that the Reapers need to be  _destroyed_.

_This is for Anderson_. She thinks, near stumbling at first, lifting the gun to fire off the first shot.

_This is for Garrus_. Her steps grow stronger, faster, using both arms to steady the gun as she fires.

_This is for everyone we’ve lost to this goddamn war!_  She fires until the chamber bursts open and a tremor rushes through the space, the sound of a giant gun echoing through.

Arisa slumps to the ground, dropping the gun and panting, listening to the load-up sequence with a feeling of detached victory.

The Catalyst is gone - whether it’s been absorbed by the Crucible or just no longer wishes to talk, she doesn’t know and doesn’t care. Even in the end it had tried to sway her, and it hadn’t worked.

Commander Shepard was no one's pawn.

She thinks she hears the Crucible firing - thinks she can hear it ripping through the Reapers.

All she knows for sure is that Garrus’ face flashes through her mind when the ceiling starts to collapse, and she grits her teeth and  _reaches_ , ignoring the pain.

The barrier goes up just before the rubble hits her.

* * *

 

  _Pain. The Crucible. Ceiling falling. Debris._

Arisa can’t open her eyes, blackness engulfing her, coming hazily to consciousness. When had she passed out? Was the Crucible still firing? What-

_Debris falling. Garrus. I promised Garrus. I promised_ -!

She doesn’t question how easy it is to grab her biotics this time; just grits her teeth and  _pushes_ , feeling the barrier come up around her.

And going dead still at the voices reacting to it.

Voices.  _Voices_?

“Biotics?!” someone's shrieking, the voice unfamiliar, “Get the Doctor in here! She’s using Biotics in her sleep!”

“No, she’s not,” a second voice - familiar and so  _calm_ , always so calm, that can’t be - “If she’s using Biotics then she’s coming  _awake_. Finally, some  _hope_.”

“Shepard, Sweetie,” a third voice croons to her left, and her attention is immediately locked on it because that  _can’t be him_ , it can’t be, “Arisa, if you can hear me, your boyfriend would appreciate you  _opening your eyes and letting down the barrier._ ”

Arisa’s eyes snap open and she shoots into a sitting position with a gasp, head swimming momentarily as the barrier dissipates.

She stares, unblinking, at the room around her, heart thundering, breath coming in nearly frantic pants.

She’d been laying in a hospital bed, wires and IVs hooked into both arms - and she registers, momentarily, that the room looks to be in  _much better shape_  then she’d have expected, given the Catalysts warnings.

There’s near mountains of cards and flowers on the windowsill, looking out on an expanse of land not destroyed enough to be London. Or maybe they’ve made progress - she can see construction, see things being rebuilt, the sun shining on a planet no longer under invasion.

Then her head turns and green eyes meet bright blue and he’s all she can see, starring in hope and disbelief and the tiniest speck of  _fear_.

No blood coats his armor now, and he’s no more scarred than he’d been before the return to Earth. He’s not even  _in_  armor, she realizes, just the civvies she’d always liked him in, black and blue and silver, better to curl close and feel the heat of him-

“I’m dead.” she croaks after a moment, startled by how weak her own voice is. From disuse, she would say, if she were alive, but…?

Garrus’ mandibles flicker out in brief amusement before he’s taking the last few steps towards her bed and settling on the edge, reaching for her hand. “Hate to break it to you, but you’re  _alive_. Despite the Reapers best efforts, of course. You did it.”

Emotion wells up at his touch, and she wants nothing more than to bury herself in his chest and disappear. But she has to know. “How am I…?”

“Partially thanks to that impressive Barrier of yours, I’d imagine.” comes the second voice again, and Arisa looks over just as Miranda steps up beside her bed, expression a mix of smugness and relief, “Your implants also helped, of course. They malfunctioned briefly, just after we found you, but nothing I couldn’t fix. Your wounds were honestly much less life threatening then I’d have expected. But then, you  _are_  Commander Shepard.”

“Miranda.” Arisa can’t help it - it’s just the three of them in the room and she’s beaten and tired and drained, surely she’s allowed a little bit of emotion? - so she reaches out with her free hand, relieved when the brunette takes it without question. “I owe you again, huh? And you said after  _we_  found you, as in?”

“I was there, yes; a team of volunteers sent to try and recover your remains, if nothing else.”

Arisa shakes her head, looks at Garrus briefly, “Where were…?”

“The Normandy got stuck a couple of systems away when the Mass Relays went down; we’re all in one piece, ship included, so we got back fairly soon afterwards, but…” Garrus bowed his head, mandibles pulled in tight, “...I wasn’t there, the first couple months. I’m sorry.”

“I’m just glad you’re alive.” she squeezes his hand, tries to smile before turning back to Miranda, “Who else was in this volunteer squad?”

“A few I didn’t recognize, really; you made  _quite_  the impression. They wanted to find you to honor you. I wanted to find you alive.” the smugness is back, Miranda’s grip tightening before releasing, “Jack, Samara and I found you and brought you back.”

“Jack? The two of you… worked  _together_?”

“What can I say? We’re both stubborn. And none of us believed you were dead. Mix that with biotics powerful enough to move rubble - we got you back in one piece.”

She’s not sure what to say to that, other than a quiet “Thank you.” as her gaze finds its way back to Garrus, hand safe between both of his, and she feels tears start to prick.

After everything they’ve been through - everything they’ve accomplished, surely she’s allowed to show emotion  _now_?

Miranda must notice because she brings up her omnitool and glances something over before heading towards the doors, heels clicking as she goes “I’ll let everyone else know you’re awake, and let Dr. Chakwas know to give you two a few minutes. I imagine you have questions, Shepard; let me know when you’re ready.”

Arisa doesn’t respond; just listens to the hiss of the doors closing, keeping her eyes on Garrus, right hand settling on his arm.

He’s real. They’re alive.  _They did it_.

And when one of his hands comes up to cradle the back of her skull and he presses his forehead to hers, she loses the battle.

“Let it out.” Garrus hums, sub-vocals rumbling through her, keeping his grip on her as the tears start to fall, crooning gently. “You did it.”

That only makes her sob harder, arms finding their way around his neck to hold on, to anchor herself.

_We did it. We’re alive. We’re together. Spirits, I didn’t lose him._

_We have time, now._

They’d been running since they met, brought together as first friends and then more in the middle of a war.

Now they would get to explore that relationship without worrying about their lives.

“I love you.” she whispers, sobs dying down, shivering when he gently licks the remnants of her tears from her cheeks, “I love you  _so damn much_ , Garrus.”

Garrus nuzzles her for a moment, arms slipping gently around her waist, before he nudges his mandible against her cheek and sighs “I love you, Arisa Shepard. And I am not letting you go  _anywhere_  without me, ever again.”

“It's a deal.” she laughs, and kisses him.

**Author's Note:**

> More to come. Kudos and comments make my day ♥


End file.
